Tag: hope

Where we live, there are thousands of seeds falling from our Maple trees. We always called them helicopters as kids because they twirl around as they fall to the ground. Our neighborhood is covered with them.

Normally, I wouldn’t pay much attention to them except to tell Steve that I needed him to clean them out of the gutters because I worried that our gutters would be clogged.

This year, they are a bit more symbolic to me.

Each year, I plant a garden. Steve would always tell me not to get my hopes up because I LITERALLY never succeeded in growing anything. Even my cucumbers grew into funky c shape inedible things.

But I start each summer with a glimmer in my eye thinking it’s going to be different and I am going to have sooo many vegetables, I’ll be handing them out to neighbors and friends.

Last year, my friends built me an AMAZING above ground garden. They even helped me plant it and supplied special fertilized soil. I felt as if I was finally going to be able to share my vegetable wealth!

The only thing I succeeded in growing were mushrooms. And not the mushrooms you eat, the nasty fungus mushrooms that you pull out of your grass.

So…. another year with a failed garden in spite of basically having a garden tutor.

Last week, my friend came back over, physically MOVED the above ground garden and planted the vegetables I requested. He used a different soil and added manure… Not sure how I feel about that. But I REALLY want my vegetables to grow this year… so, I’m dealing with cow poop in my garden.

So, back to the helicopters… Each morning, I go out before work and I pick out as many helicopters as I can from my beloved garden.

When I come home from work, I go back outside and pick out MORE of the helicopters (and there are plenty).

Believe it or not, I go back out after dinner and remove the helicopters one last time before going to bed.

So, as you can see, these Maple seeds are a huge inconvenience and yet I am unwavering in protecting my garden and making sure not to let any Maple Trees grow.

As I was picking out the helicopters this evening, I realized the whole experience could be compared to my life right now.

I have built this amazing, beautiful, life garden.

Things were growing and succeeding in my garden.

Then, helicopters started landing.

First, Covid.

Next, Quarantine.

Then, Steve got sick.

Then, we lost Steve.

Then, we lost my Dad.

And in spite of it all, I kept picking the helicopters out of my life garden.

At first, I felt like leaving the helicopters there.

What was the point of picking them out?

My life had been forever changed.

Then, I realized I can’t give up.

I need to make sure that the helicopters don’t overtake my life garden.

I have 2 FANTASTIC children, a job that I love, a wonderfully supportive family and a house surrounded by neighbors that love me and watch over me.

So, I will continue to remove the helicopters from my gardens.

And I will remind myself that helicopters don’t fall year round.

I can make it through the helicopter season one day at a time.