If you have been following my blog, you know that we have now passed the year mark. According to Judaism, I have now completed the ritualistic time frame for mourning.
That there is a time frame, in and of itself, seems ridiculous.
But in some ways, it is a bit freeing.
Throughout this journey, I have had many moments filled with tears and despair.
But, I have also had moments of laughter, gratefulness and joy. And sometimes, during those moments of happiness, I stop and feel a little bit guilty.
I wonder what others might think if they hear me laughing and smiling.
I know I shouldn’t care what others think. And I also know that those that truly love me are happy to see a twinkle in my eye.
I’m also pretty sure people are happy to hear my snarky sense of humor once again.
In a way, I’m glad that there is an “accepted” time frame for grieving so I can stop second guessing myself.
I have also heard that the second year is somehow more challenging than the first.
The first year you are just surviving.
The next year you must learn how to thrive.
Everyone tells you, “The firsts are the hardest. You just need to get through the firsts.”
But, once you get through the firsts, you are kind of on your own. Life moves on for everyone else and you are still fighting your demons and trying to find your way.
According to common beliefs, a year is really all you should need for mourning.
It’s a little bit terrifying.
These past few days, I have learned how truly blessed I am and that maybe my second year won’t be so challenging.
Although my obligational year of mourning has passed, people have proven that they have not forgotten about our little family of three.
When my shower door shattered, I was a little bit overwhelmed with the mess it created and the daunting task of buying and installing a new door.
To my surprise, loved ones and friends volunteered to clean up the mess, help pick up the door and INSTALL it!
When I woke up to snow this morning, I was dreading the thought of shoveling.
Within minutes, I received a text from one of my best friends letting me know her husband would be over in a few minutes to take care of my driveway!
As I sat in my bedroom, I could simultaneously hear someone shoveling and someone plowing. To my surprise, TWO people had come to take care of the snow for me!
It literally brought me to tears. I was overwhelmed with feelings of gratitude.
I don’t know what I did to deserve this wonderful treatment but I do not take it for granted.
I know there are many other people out there who have lost a loved one and they are facing these challenges alone.
I can’t even imagine what it would be like to take this journey without help. No matter how much time passes, I will always need my tribe of friends and family.
If you follow my blog, and you are feeling alone, I want to invite you to reach out to me. That may sound weird, but I truly mean it. I am here. Everyone needs a shoulder to lean on.
If you are reading my blog and you are lucky to not be dealing with grief or loss right now, take a moment to reach out to someone you know who might need a friendly voice or gesture.
One tiny good deed could have a tremendous impact on someone in need.
I know that today, I felt so incredibly loved and supported. I am so very grateful.
I hope that I can do the same for others.
No one should be dealing with loss or sadness alone.
There should be no time frame for providing grace and support to those who have lost someone they love.
onedayatatime 